In Igbo culture, the traditional wedding is called Igba Nkwu (The Wine Carrying Ceremony) and it’s an important part of the wedding process when the bride carries the wine from her father to look for her groom.
What is a wine carrying ceremony?
The Wine carrying ceremony is the most important aspect of the traditional wedding where the bride goes in search of her husband in the crowd, gives him the blessed palm wine before holding his hand to meet her family
What is the symbolic meaning of the wine wedding?
Wine can symbolize the bond that lasts through times of joy and sorrow. Two goblets of wine, one sweet and one dry, are placed on a table. The Bride and Groom each drink from the sweet wine, followed by the dry, whiles the celebrant reminds them of the changing fortunes of life.
The “Igba Nkwu Nwanyi” which means ‘The wine carrying of a woman’ is the customary traditional marriage ceremony of the Igbo people of Nigeria. Marriage in Igbo culture is a family affair. The family members, the kindred, community are all involved in the marriage process.
When a man sees a lady he intends to marry, he made it known to her; he then informs his parent. If the lady accepts the marriage proposal, with the consent of his parent, the Igbo traditional marriage process begins.
Before a man takes an Igbo lady as a wife, there are several steps/stages that must be followed. This steps differs slightly from one community to another.
The first Introduction- Ikwu Aka (Knocking/to inquiry)
The intending groom accompanied by his father or an elder relative or a close family friend to visit the parents of the lady to be formally introduced and state their son’s intention to marry their daughter.
They take with them some drinks to the home of the bride-to-be (but not compulsory at this stage). The man’s family will not expect an answer from the lady’s family in regard to propose of their visit at this first meeting. They will schedule another date for the second meeting with the bride-to-be kinsmen (Umunna). Before the second meeting, come the Iju Ese/ Iju Agugu.
Family Background Investigation – Iju Ese/ Iju Agugu
After the first meeting, both families will carry out investigation on each other to know if the families are of good linage, character, health information, religious practice etc. The outcome of this investigation determines the next step in the marriage process.
Bride Price or Dowry – Imego Nwanyi
This is the money paid by the groom to the parent of the bride-to-be. This stage comes with a lot of negotiation between the groom’s family and the bride. At the end, there is always an agreement.
In some families, the father of the bride takes the bride price (the negotiated amount), takes little out of it and returns the rest of the money to the groom’s family stating that he is not giving out his daughter for sale but rather as a companion to he and he should take care of their daughter.
In the case of divorce in future according to Igbo culture, the exact amount collected by the bride’s father will be returned to the groom’s family.
The Bride’s Wine Carrying – Igba Nkwu Nwanyi
This is also known as the traditional wedding day. It is an agreed date chosen by the groom’s family for the Igba Nkwu Nwanyi event to be held at the bride’s family compound. This is an open event whereby the public are invited along with friends and well-wishers to witness the union of the couple.
The bride is given a calabash cup known as “Iko” filled with palm wine by her father (or an uncle in the case the bride’s father is late), to ‘search’ and ‘show’ the public who she has chosen as a husband.
Old and young men beckon on her to bring the drink to them in the process of this ‘searching’ for her husband. When she finally sees her husband, she kneels before him, sip the drink and offer it to him, he collects and drink the palm wine. This signifies they are traditionally married. This action is followed by cheers and jubilation from the audience.
The groom put some money (no specific amount) inside the calabash cup as they dance to meet the parent of the bride for marriage blessings. After the parental marriage blessings, the ceremony now climax with native music (live bands or Djs) dance by the couple, friends and well-wishers; feasting and merriment continues and presentation of gifts as well. At the end, the bride follows the groom’s family to their home signifying a change of home and addiction to her husband’s family.
Idu Uno (Bride settlement)
After the traditional wedding, comes the ‘Idu Uno’ (Bride settlement) by her family. Before the bride embarks on her journey to the husband’s home, her family gives her a lot of gift items to start family life with.
