Real talk for teens who feel pushed, pressured or just plain confused
“My Daughter’s Just 15 and Already in University Studying Medicine!” The proud father beamed as he told his colleagues during their lunch break.
“That’s fantastic,” said Mr. Adesanya, sipping his malt. “My boy in S.S.2 is already 16 o, and we’re still thinking what next. How did she do that?”
“Well, we drilled her,” the man continued. “Started preparing for WAEC from S.S.1. We skipped S.S.3 completely. That one is a waste of time abeg.”
Mrs. Wanye, seated quietly beside them, finally spoke. “But… have you considered if she’s emotionally ready?”
The men blinked. Silence.
Real talk: It’s not just “smart kids” That enter uni early
Here’s the truth:
Sometimes it’s pressure.
Sometimes it’s comparison.
Sometimes it’s just because people around you decided to “fast-track” your life.
Yes, you might be smart. But you might also be confused, exhausted, or feel like everyone around you understands the plot — except you.
Let’s say it out loud:
Being smart doesn’t mean being ready.
And graduating early doesn’t guarantee peace of mind.
What’s going on in your head, anyway?
Your frontal lobe, the part of your brain that helps you plan, think clearly, regulate emotions, make mature decisions, doesn’t fully develop until about age 25.
So when you find yourself in a university class at 15 or 16, surrounded by older students, trying to manage academic pressure, social life, and maybe even hostel wahala… your brain might still be learning how to cope.
That’s why you may:
Cry over “small things”
Feel anxious but not know why
Feel “behind” even though you’re ahead
Start questioning your course choice
Get tired of pretending to be an adult when you’re still growing
So what’s the “right age” For university?
There’s no perfect age, but science, and lived experience, shows that between 18 and 20, most teens are better emotionally prepared for the demands of adult learning spaces.
It’s not just about passing WAEC or JAMB. It’s about:
Knowing why you want to study something
Understanding your limits
Navigating social situations
Handling stress in healthy ways
“but my parents said…”
When parents say things like:
“Don’t you want to graduate early?”
Try saying:
“I want to succeed, not just finish fast. Can we find a pace that helps me do both?”
Or when they pull the classic:
“Because I said so.”
You can respond with:
“I respect you, but I want to talk about what’s going on in my mind too. I’m trying to figure things out.”
(They may not always say yes — but trust me, they hear you.)
QUIZ TIME: Are You Growing or Just Going With the Flow?
Be honest. This isn’t JAMB.
- Why did you pick your course?
- A) I’ve loved it forever.
- B) I just picked anything to avoid wahala.
- C) My parents chose it.
- When your parents say, “Don’t you want to graduate early?”, you feel:
- A) Yes! I’ve planned for this.
- B) I’m not sure, but I nod.
- C) I’m scared to say no.
- When overwhelmed, you:
- A) Re-strategize or ask for help.
- B) Pretend you’re okay.
- C) Zone out or cry in the bathroom.
- Do you understand why you’re doing what you’re doing?
- A) Fully.
- B) Not really.
- C) I’m just… here.
- When your parents say “Because I said so,” you:
- A) Ask for a calm talk.
- B) Keep quiet.
- C) Complain to your friends.
YOUR SCORE:
Mostly A’s – You’re self-aware. Keep talking, asking, and growing.
Mostly B’s – You’re surviving, not thriving. Let’s slow down and find your voice.
Mostly C’s – You’re probably confused, burnt out or being pushed hard. Time to pause and regroup.
Breathe. Pause. You’re Still a Teen.
You’ll only be a teenager for a short time, but you’ll be an adult for the rest of your life (no pressure ).
This part of your life matters. It’s okay to:
: Make mistakes
: Laugh at yourself
: Not have it all figured out
: Let others decide a few things for you (for now)
: Say “I don’t know yet” and mean it
This season is for building. And guess what?
Adulthood is a scam, don’t rush there.( and you need serious stuff to be able to navigate that world).
Final word
You are more than a grade.
More than a course.
More than your parents’ timetable.
Take your time. Grow on purpose.
Ask questions. Breathe deeply.
And remember: you’re becoming; and that’s powerful.
